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unknown Unknown Slim Santa Elf: May I have your attention please! Elf: May I have your attention please! Elf: Will the Real Slim Santa please stand up! Elf: I repeat! Elf: Will the Real Slim Santa Please Stand UP! Elf: We're Gonna have a problem here. Yall act like you never seen Santa before, Toy's all over your floor, Who the hell you think brought them, it wasn't drunk dad or your mother that whore, It was me now Im skinny and Ill tell you the score. It's the return of Christmas, but not the jolly fat elf. My @$$ got so big I couldn't wipe it myself! And my docter said, "Santa, you've never looked worse, lose 200 pounds or your hearts gonna burst!" Everybody loved me' big and fat, Ho Ho Ho! big assed santa, look at him walkin around his belly like jelly, have some more Egg Nog! They didn't give a **** if my arteries clogged. So I said **** them and i joined a gym. Started eating low fat cookies, drinkin milk that was skim! I lost so much weight that i could see my candy cane, and Mrs. Clause is happy I can **** her again! Your name is on my list! Your name is on my list! And if you nice not naughty I might give you a little gift. But heres a message for you if youre a big fat slob: If your guts in the way a girl wont bob on your knob You cant expect a ho to gobble your goo if you just sit there eatin Twinkies watchin Scooby Doo If you aint nothing but chubby, no girl wants a fat hubby! You'll end up working construction... Your love life lies in ruins and destruction! By the time your thirty youll be askin santa for lypo-suction! But if your thin, youll get suduction, underneath the mistle toe, sing the chorus and it goes...! I'm Slim Santa, Yes im the real Kringle, all you fly girls like my balls cus' they jingle! So won't the real slim santa please stand up, please stand up, please stand up! Cuase' I'm Slim Santa, Yes im the saint nick, all you other fat Santas can suck my fat ****! So won't the real slim Santa please stand up, please stand up, please stand up! Ho, Ho, Ho, Ho! I guess there's a Slim Santa in all of us. On Donner, On Blitzen...lets get the **** outta here! |
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